A Fight From Within
by boxxybrown506
Summary: The Crucible is fired, a red wave spreads across the galaxy destroying the Reapers ending the Harvest once and for all-or has it? Shepard wakes up faced with unwanted truths that could finally break the Hero of the Citadel but with the help of his bondmate Liara, Shepard will fight to see this to the end. My take on indoctrination theory. Rated M for violence, language, and sex.
1. The End?

_**Everyone gathered at the memory wall in front of the elevator on the crew deck. No one knew exactly what to say so they remained quiet. Liara clutched the nameplate tight before stumbling up to the wall. She looked down and ran her hand across the letters "Shepard". She looked up at the board and a small smile started to form on her lips. He heard it faintly even though her lips didn't move. I'm yours.**_

_Gasp_

Pain. That was the first thing that registered in Shepard's mind. It was hard to breathe, his ears were ringing, and his entire left side was on fire, but the pain was good. The pain let him know that he was still alive, barely. His head was heavy, and weighed down from the war that had raged in his mind. He tried to crack his eyes open and instantly regretted it. Through the static on his sentry interface the blinding, blue light was like a sledgehammer to his brain. He closed them again trying to get any idea of where he was through his other senses. He was lying on something hard and cold. He could smell dust, blood, and sweat. Shepard breathed in as deep as he could and tried to open his eyes again. His gut wrenched, as he was able to register where he was.

The blue beam of light was twenty yards away and there were scattered bodies everywhere, both reaper and allied. As the ringing subsided he could hear a radio with Coats' voice, "God...they're all gone."

Another marine came over the channel, "Did we get anyone to the beam?"

"Negative. Our entire force was decimated."

_Son of a bitch!_ It wasn't real. He never made it to the beam, he didn't kill the Illusive Man, and the reapers were still alive. Despair and failure was closing in on him like never before. He had never let either take over. He couldn't in his job, but this defeat was harder to take**. **_**I need to know your always coming back**__._ Liara's words were running through his head. No, he had to stop this, if not for all life, at least for her.

The headset was buggy and shorting out so he ripped it off, and threw it to the side. He had to put most of his weight on his right side, but he was able to get up. He looked around and saw no one else around just like the dream, but instead of the silent emptiness he saw the battleground littered with destroyed Makos, bodies, and ash. He could hear Harbinger groaning off to the left dealing with an assault attacking it's left flank. This was his chance as he stumbled toward the beam. He grabbed the Paladin on his side in case a Marauder popped out like the dream, but no such luck. Ten yards from the beam two cannibals looked up from their scavenging to see Shepard approaching the beam. They let out a scream and started firing. He started running as fast as he could towards the beam his breath sawing through his lungs. He could feel the blistered tissue on his left side stretching and ripping as he moved closer. He lunged through the beam. His body was ejected out onto a metal floor. Instead of a red-lit hallway littered with corpses and keepers, Shepard found himself lying in what looked to be one of the access ways under the wards that was shutdown and closed off by the keepers after the Saren attack. The hallway made him uneasy as he made his way through the sterile steel and empty corridors. The Citadel was usually crowded and loud. The walkways would be bustling with people and the occasional keeper. The silence just made it unnatural. Shepard had found a welcome sight as he approached the terminal. The blue and pink VI blinked in front of him with a cheery disposition that didn't seem to mesh with the current events. "Welcome back Shepard. It has been—"

"Avina, I need to know how to open the Citadel arms."

"I am sorry, that information is classified."

"I have Spectre authorization. I need to know how to open the Citadel arms."

"Processing Spectre clearance. Spectre access granted. Access to the Citadel console has been moved after the Geth attack. The access point is now located in a secure area on top of the Citadel Tower. To access this area you must proceed to the Counsel Chamber and take the elevator to the top level. An elevator is located seven meters on your left. Have a nice day Commander."

Shepard walked away from the VI. He had to hack the elevator, but it soon took off toward the embassies. Shepard went to lean his face on the cool surface of the steel wall and tried not to look at the distorted reflection. The metal felt good on his still smoldering skin, but the pain was almost unbearable. He was just grateful his legs still worked, even though he couldn't feel his left leg. He tried to concentrate on anything else, but the only thing that helped was Liara. He tried to focus on big cyan eyes, and soft blue skin. He could see her standing in front of him on their flight to Illos. She was usually so shy and sometimes soft-spoken, but this time she looked him in the eyes, her voice steady. The next mission had everyone worried. Low odds of success and possible death have a way to spur people into action. _**I want this to be special.**_

"Second level Embassies." Shepard walked through the deserted offices and toward the Chamber when he came upon two bodies. They were cannibals, both fresh kills. He was not alone. Someone did make it through. Could Coats have been wrong? Was it Anderson? A sense relief flowed through him as he continued on. He approached the stand that faced the council. Standing there now he could only smile wryly. It was at this very place that Shepard tried to convince the Council to believe him. Every thing he had warned them about—Saren, the reapers—they ignored him. Now here he was bloody, bruised, and right. Unfortunately, he couldn't dwell on this small victory long. He lurched forward and started accessing the terminal. He was able to find the encrypted code and called the elevator. A platform started to descend from the high ceiling, and landed in front of the stand. The railing retracted and he stepped aboard. He didn't dare try to lean on the railing knowing he could very easily topple over the top of it. The platform stopped and Shepard looked around with disbelief. He was standing in the very same control room he had seen in the visions. A great window spread out before the panel, but instead of Anderson, there was a figure he knew too well.

"Shepard. Are you still alive?" The Illusive Man turned around. His eye implants glowed blue as he looked at the Commander. The reaper implants were starting to breakthrough the skin around those eyes making him look more mechanical than human. An M-9 Tempest was lying on the console ignored. "You are proving to be more tenacious than even I believed. The Alliance thinks your dead you know. I've been listening to the chatter. I think they aren't sure what to do with themselves now that the great Commander Shepard isn't there to save them anymore."

"Get out of my way before you make me do something I really want to do." Shepard held out his gun and aimed it at the indoctrinated traitor.

"Shepard, you won't shoot me. I know you too well for that threat. You must know this is all for humanities sake."

"Your not even human any more. Look at you! The reaper implants are taking over your body. No one can control the reapers. Power like that doesn't last."

The Illusive Man continued to walk farther from the console. "The same thing could be said about you. All those implants we put into you. Most would say your more machine than man. The sheer fact that you are standing despite your injuries is a testament to that. But you are right about controlling them. Like all life the reapers would just evolve to reject that control. But I have been shown a better way. The Catalyst has shown me."

Slowly a realization had occurred to the Commander. "How did it show you?"

"Like all truths: through visions. I could see all the death this so-called war has caused. All the shadows. Their inky blackness would stand off to the side as a boy lead me through the dark forest. Are you familiar with Isaiah Chapter 11 Verse 6? 'In that day the wolf and lamb will live together; the leopard and the goat will be at peace. Calves and yearlings will be safe among lions, and a little child shall lead them.' Don't you see Shepard; the Catalyst came to me as a little boy. He said that we could save every living being. Peace will be restored."

He became nauseous as everything fell together. Everything that he saw, and the dreams were all apart of it. This entire time he had blamed those that were indoctrinated when all along he...no. He thought back to all the reports he read, and the scientists' logs on the dead reaper. He knew what was involved in indoctrination, but as he stood here some facts just weren't adding up. Before, when he stood in this room with Anderson and this twisted shell of a man he remembered how the two had fought. He could see the inky black apparitions pushing at the edges of his vision every time the Illusive Man talked and the headache that always came with them. In the end he chose to ignore the Illusive Man and he chose to destroy the reapers. Now as he stood here looking at what could only be described as a reaper puppet understanding started to form. "What did you chose?"

"What are you talking about, Shepard?"

He gripped the gun tighter feeling the bones in his hand crack with the pressure. "In the vision you had three choices: control, synthesize, or destroy; blue, green, or red. Which one did you chose? You could only choose one, now which one was it?"

"This was no vision, Shepard. I talked to the Catalyst. It stood in front of me as real as you are, and it told me that synthesis was the only way we could save everyone. I would have figured that someone like you would see this was the only choice. The first human Spectre, the man who united the galaxy to fight the reapers." The Illusive Man turned back to the console. "You'll thank me for this. I have finally seen the truth. For years I have been charged with bigotry against all other races, but I have seen what you've been saying all along. All life must be preserved: human, asari, and reaper. The entire galaxy will thank me for my sacrifice."

All Shepard could do was hold his head as his thoughts spun around his confused brain. What does this mean? Suddenly his head was hit with a sharp piercing pain. Yet, when he looked up there were no black shadows dancing in his periphery. Instead there was pain. Horrible, horrible pain that started in the front of his head and spread down the back of his neck. He could see the Illusive Man standing there trying to initiate the console. "I hate to disappoint you," Shepard leveled his gun at the Illusive Man, "but like I said when we first met, 'You don't know me.'" With that Shepard pulled the trigger and shot him. A double tap to the lower back brought him down. He walked toward the console and smiled. It felt good to finally shoot that asshole after all that has happened. He was able to open the arms and watched as the Crucible pulled in to position. He opened a COM channel to listen in.

"My God! Someone actually did it. All ships move ahead and protect the Crucible at all costs." The mechanism was locked into place and the console seemed to recognize the mechanism as a new menu was opened. He went to continue initiating the code when he was hit by a crippling headache. He looked down at the Illusive Man to find his eyes glowing green and his voice was distorted like that of the Catalyst. "You must not proceed. If you do this, chaos will consume the galaxy. Think of all those lives you'll be taking away after you gave them hope. You must think about the upgraded Geth, think about EDI. If you proceed they all die."

"Or are your just pleading for your creations. Leviathan told me about your betrayal. Software that was corrupted into what it was suppose to prevent. How do I know your not just trying preserve your work?"

He was hit with another migraine that brought him to his knees. He could hear the Catalyst crawling way. "How is this possible? How can you repel my touch? You are just one man. You will bend to my will."

It felt like a hot omni-blade was slicing his skull open. His vision blurred, and he began to heave._** You cajole and threaten and you make tremendous sacrifices.**_ No, he must do this. He cannot fail. Screaming with renewed purpose Shepard stood and sent the command. "Command Alpha sent. The code will be sent at 3.7 Petawatts, which is hazardous to unshielded organics. Warning: interior of station—"

"Let me guess is not shielded. Sounds familiar." Shepard turned around to leave when the Illusive Man stopped him. He was trying to crawl towards him, but Shepard just ignored him. "You will regret this. My work is not finished."

As Shepard got onto the platform he pulled out his handgun and shot him in the head. "I guess we'll see about that." The platform touched down and Shepard started to run as fast as he could but his legs didn't want to cooperate. He could hear the countdown over the automated system. "10...9...8...3...2...1" The blast was sent across the galaxy with a great yellow beam. Everywhere reapers fell into giant useless heaps of metal. As reaper codes were destroyed Cerberus agents writhed on the ground in pain. Geth stopped and powered down in the middle of the fray as a great yellow wave flowed over the battlefields like a biblical flood taking all the reaper forces with it.

Back on the Citadel Shepard lay on the ground where he was thrown. He just couldn't hang on any more. He was so tired. He just wanted to stop and rest. Tears started to gather in his eyes as he thought of her blue eyes looking up at him. He could see the soft smile she wore every time she woke up and saw him. He wouldn't be able to keep that promise he made to her. _**I love you too. Show me.**_ This was the best way he could show her how much he loved her. He closed his eyes and finally let go.


	2. 2 Hours Prior

2 Hours Prior

Liara didn't want to leave but Garrus didn't give her an option. He pulled her towards the back of the shuttle bay as she strained to watch Shepard sprinting towards the beam. "Come on Liara. He needs to know you're safe and taken care of."

They limped towards the elevator passing the triage area that was setup in the hanger. It seemed that along the way the Normandy was able to pick up two other assault teams that had suffered heavy losses. A medic directed them both to the Med Bay after taking one look at the two of them. "I can't lose him again, Garrus. I don't know if I could survive it a second time."

The turian didn't say anything. He could remember how much she grieved after the SR-1 was destroyed. During the memorial service he could remember seeing the visceral reaction she had at his death. He couldn't imagine how she reacted after seeing him when she stole his body from the Shadow Broker. A body generally didn't hold up well after an explosion and then being exposed to space. He had mourned his friend as well, but the connection between the two was deeper than anyone could imagine.

The elevator door slid open, and Garrus pulled Liara toward the Med Bay. Dr. Chakwas was directing medics and supplies. She saw the two enter and pointed them towards an empty bunk. "Liara on the bunk, Garrus go to Specialist Li." She turned to the young medic, "Li, help the turian. Looks like he's got some burns and a couple contusions and lacerations." She then turned to a woman who was washing her hands at the sink. "Roberts take over for me while I help the doctor."

"Don't worry about me, Dr. Chakwas. I just need some bandages."

The older woman was deceptively strong as she placed a hand on the asari's shoulder. "No Liara, I believe your injuries are much more severe than that." Liara had no choice but to lie back down. The doctor looked her over with the omnitool. "You have some third degree burns, the laceration on your thigh is not as bad as it looks, but it looks like you have some internal bleeding." Liara shook her head confused. She hadn't felt anything during the battle, but as the doctor gently pushed on her side Liara let out a surprised yelp. "We'll need to relieve the pressure that's building. We'll start you on an IV to get your blood pressure back up, but I don't think it's too serious. We'll keep you in observation to make sure it doesn't develop into something serious. It's going to be okay, Liara."

Liara laid on the metal slab as the doctor started to cut into her skin. She couldn't feel the sting as her mind strayed to the battlefield. Her last sight of John was of him rushing towards the beam. She willed him to come back, but he would not have listened. She closed her eyes and retreated to the memories she shared with him. He was sitting at his desk; hunched over as he was putting delicate touches on a turian cruiser model she had gotten him. He had told her one night that as a child his parents would tell him what ship they would be serving on by giving him a model of it. Before his father died they would huddle together at the small table in the family quarters and put the model together. _**I don't know . . . marriage, old age, and a lot of little blue children**_. She needed him to come back. Despite everything that had happened she had started to hope for a future filled with little blue girls, and nights huddled around a table putting together model ships. That future didn't exist without John. She had tired to not hope for a future once the reapers hit, but John had taught her to hope, especially in the direst of circumstances.

She could only hear a faint chatter around her.

"They did it. Someone made it to the beam."

"It has to be Shepard. Who else could have made."

Her eyes flew open and she searched around the Med Bay, but found herself out in the lounge area with a few other soldiers lying on cots. Liara could see Dr. Chakwas through the Med Bay windows supervising her people yet again. They had converted the lounge into a recovery area. Two Alliance soldiers were talking not that far away. _Could it be true?_ She started to get up and instantly regretted it when she felt the sharp pain in her side. Her light Alliance armor was removed before the procedure and she was just left in her white undershirt and gray shorts. She lifted the shirt to find the clear medipatch covering the clean incision. Slowly she got up, and a medic came over. "Dr. T'soni, I'm going to need you to lay back down."

"Has there been news about the beam? Did someone get through?"

The young human looked conflicted, "The word is someone made it to the Citadel twenty minutes ago, but—"

Liara was already getting up. She was trying to pull the IV out but the medic was trying to fight her off. "Listen, I'm getting up with or without your say so." Her body began to radiate with biotic energy, and the medic could read the threat clearly.

"Fine, but if you pass out you snuck out. Deal?"

Liara dropped her biotic field and the medic took out the IV. She got up and walked the short distance to her quarters. She was only able to put on a pair of pants and her boots before the pain started bothering her. She made her way to the Bridge where she found everyone waiting for word. Garrus and Kaidan stood behind Joker while Javik waited by the airlock. They were all silent as they listened to Hackett. "The Crucible is in place, and the weapon armed. If you can read me on the other end we need you to activate it. The controls are on your side. Can you hear me? Commander is that you? Please respond?"

There was a long wait on the other end. Joker looked over at EDI, "Can you find anything EDI?"

"Nothing conclusive. One moment. There are some strange reading coming from the Crucible. It is attempting to send out a series of viruses at 3.7 Petawatts of force. All unshielded life on the Citadel will be in danger." EDI looked over at Joker with a worried look. "I'm sorry Jeff. Shutting down systems to preserve integrity. Recommend warning Geth forces. Signal will be sent in two minutes."

Jeff looked worried as Kaidan ran toward the CIC to send the warning. "What do you mean, EDI what's going on?"

"It will be OK Jeff. I love you. Shutting down systems." EDI's mech slumped over as the orange interface shut down. Sorrow seemed to flood Joker as he looked over at the lifeless android.

Liara summoned Glyph to give him orders to warn the other forces and to immediately shut down. "Jeff, she's trying to keep herself safe. If this is what she thinks needs to be done, than this is the only option she has." Still dazed Joker turned back to his controls. Hackett sent the order to fall back to the rendezvous site and Joker started to act. "Wait! What are you doing? We have to wait for Shepard. He's going to need transport off of there. You heard what EDI said. He won't survive on there."

Garrus placed his hand on her shoulder, "We need to get out of here. Who knows if those viruses will affect the Normandy? He would never forgive us if we didn't get you out of danger."

She pushed at him and started to grab at Joker who was trying to turn around from the Citadel. Garrus pulled her away calling to Vega and Javik for help. They managed to drag her towards the CIC where she threw them off with a biotic field. The struggle was taxing, but the final biotic attack took whatever strength she had left. Liara stumbled and fell. As she started to black out all she could think of was that she failed him.


	3. The Call Comes In

51 Hours Later

Volunteers were combing through the wreckage of the Citadel. The pulse had disengaged two arms and helped destroy what the reapers didn't finish off. From what they could find there was little hope of finding survivors. Most people were looking for bodies at this point. Reports hinted that a certain Alliance Commander was still unaccounted for back on Earth, which gave teams an idea of what they were looking for. Teams were sent starting from the embassies and branched out to find the one who opened the arms. Group Echo was making its way down a back corridor that lead to the wards. Two asari were moving debris with their biotics while two batarians and some Alliance soldiers were digging through some rubble. A salarian doctor hung back waiting to be needed.

One of the asari walked by a corridor and looked down the dark hallway. "Did anyone check this one?" The batarian shook his as he continued to search a pile of rubble. Turning on the light on her omnitool, she made her way down the corridor. Past some falling panels and a burnt out control consol she could see something lying up ahead. "Hey, I got something in here." She walked over, "It's a body."

The salarian and a soldier came in behind her. The young doctor rolled the body over and started to scan it. The soldier leaned close, and swore, "No fucking way, is that Commander Shepard?"

The salarian consulted the omnitool and shook his head, "Yes, it seems he is a DNA file matches of Commander John W. Shepard, Alliance N7."

The soldier called the others over, "Hey we found him, you guys. We found him. Is he alive?"

"Yes, but his pulse is weak and his injuries are extensive. It is very likely he won't survive treatment." While the doctor was replying, the asari was requesting a medical evac letting them know they had finally found the Commander. "It's a miracle he's been able to survive this long."

A shuttle was sent and the word was out; Shepard was alive and on his way to Earth. An underground clinic was already prepped and waiting for the arrival. That was where Miranda Lawson found herself after being "escorted" by Major Coats and Alliance soldiers. She stood waiting with a group of doctors and medics that gave her sidelong glances. She studied the file again. "Has the salarian given us any more information?"

"No ma'am. All the information we have has been provided." Coats gave her a stern look. He wasn't particularly found of ex-Cerberus agents, and knowing how high up this one was up in the chain of command didn't really help matters. It didn't help that she carried herself like she was God's gift to the galaxy, either. Orders were orders, and if she was the one who brought the Commander back the first time than she was the right person for this. He heard chatter over his communicator, "They're here."

They watched as a shuttle landed and the Alliance crew was pulling the gurney out. Coats had to stop as he saw the Commander. What little was left of his face could be identified as Shepard's, his left side was scorched, and his left leg was just raw sinew and exposed bone. The body lying on the gurney was a far cry from the man he met when Hammer Team arrived. He could remember the man jumping aboard his shuttle narrowly escaping an ambush. He was taller than Coats' 5'8" by almost half a foot. He chose not to wear Alliance colors, and carried a flashy M-11 Wraith and beaten up M-15 Vindicator; not exactly what the Major was expecting. He carried himself tall, but signs of war were starting to appear on his face: bags under clear green eyes, cheeks drawn in under his dark beard, and his overall ashen look. He wanted to not like the man for taking so long, but after meeting him he could tell it wasn't any easier for the Commander. He followed the group towards the operating room when he grabbed Miranda, "Can you really save him?"

She looked back at the Major, and he could see insecurity finally creep into her blue eyes. "I have to try."

Liara stretched her body feeling the most relaxed she could possibly be. The sheets were rumpled at the foot of the bed from the all the activity from earlier. The only light in the room was coming from the fish tanks off to the side. The cabin was quiet; John made sure to turn the COM off. She would never get tired of the feeling of full-bodied contentment that she got after they made love. She stretched again to savor the feeling with a smile. She could hear a deep chuckle as a strong hand reached over to glide across her stomach. She bit her lip as his lips traveled along her neck, and moved along her ridges. Her little gasps seemed to encourage him as his tongue traveled up to her crest. Unable to take it anymore Liara pushed John on his back, and in a lithe move straddled his hips. She could feel his already stiff manhood pressing up against her. His hands were reaching for her breast as soon as she sat up. His beard was growing in thicker, but his hair looked freshly buzzed. She smiled as she touched his cheek. "Did you keep this for me?"

He grinned as he sat up. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he pushed her breasts up to bury his face in her cleavage. "I thought you said you loved the feeling of my beard on your tits?"

She always got a deep physical reaction every time he used course language, and didn't he know it. She squirmed on his lap; "I don't remember saying it quite like that." She knew how to play him just as easy as he did her. With a little smile on her lips she ran her fingernails along his scalp and he growled. He took her lips in a rough kiss as he pinched her sensitive nipples. It didn't take long for the kiss to bring her close to the breaking point. She threw him back down and sank down on him with a sigh. She was moaning as she took her time slowly rocking back and forth, side to side.

He had crossed his arms behind his head and smiled. "Enjoying yourself?"

She was running her nails over his chest and down his stomach. "You know I am." Her hands had wandered to where they were joined and started to stroke herself.

He grabbed her hips and started pumping harder beneath her. She had to lean forward and brace her other hand her on his chest to keep her balance. Her breast swayed with the force his thrusts. "I fucking love your tits." Sweat made his chest glisten, and he started to grunt. "Come for me, Liara. I need you to come right now."

Not one to disobey an order, Liara started stroking herself faster. She felt the tingle at the edge of her consciousness. Her body was awash with pleasure. Not just hers, but John's. The pleasure was just too much to handle as she came hard. She could faintly hear him shout as she tried to remember to breath. The pleasure seemed to radiate from within their shared spaced.

Liara had collapsed on top of John. He was running his hands everywhere, and holding her close. "You really are amazing Dr. T'soni."

"Dr. T'soni?"

Liara's eyes popped open to find a young specialist standing in her office area. She hadn't left her quarters since she found herself there after she passed out. She tried to distance herself from what happened; instead she spent most of her time in her memories with John. Liara now understood why Kasumi buried herself in that gray box.

"Dr. T'soni, we're entering the Sol System. We'll be arriving at Earth in a couple hours. They need you up at the Bridge." The young man was looking very intently at the ground.

"Thank you, Mr. Baker." The specialist left giving Liara a chance to change before making her way up. The bridge was quiet and a bit dim. She looked to the right noting the android still missing. Garrus and Vega were also standing near by, most likely to make sure she didn't start attacking Joker again. "We've reached the Sol System?"

Joker cleared his throat, "Ah, yeah. We should be there in three hours, but that's not the reason you were called. Hackett wanted to talk to you in the QEC."

"Thank you, Joker." She started to walk away before she stopped, "And Joker. I'm sorry."

He became quiet but answered before she walked away, "Its okay. I understand." He looked over at the empty co-pilot chair.

She made it to the QEC with just a few furtive looks. As the Shadow Broker, she had always taken pride in knowing everything that was needed to know. This was an unfamiliar feeling not knowing what was going on when everyone else seemed know. "Doctor, I trust the Normandy should reach Earth within a few hours."

"That is what I've been told, Admiral."

"Good. I wanted to tell you before you heard it from anyone else that we have found Commander Shepard."

Her hands were clutching the railing desperately. "Shepard? Is he . . .?"

"He's alive for the time being. He was found on the Citadel two days ago. We have the best currently trying to help him including Miss Lawson. We have reviewed the information from the Citadel and now know what had happened. Shepard saved all our asses so you can bet everyone is doing what they can to help. I'm sending the Normandy coordinates to the hospital. When he wakes up I want you to be there."

"When, sir?"

"The Commander has to be one of the toughest men I have ever met. They've told me it doesn't' look good, but I can't see him not pulling through. We'll see you at the hospital, Doctor. Hackett out."

As the Admiral's form flickered and disappeared Liara's knees finally gave out. He was alive and on Earth. She felt a drop on her hand and looked down to see another tear fall. She knew he was alive, but to have it finally be validated made it real. She took a deep breath and stood up using the railing as support. She had to see him. She wouldn't rejoice his return until she saw him in person. "2 hours eta to Earth."


	4. A Promised Fulfilled

Liara was sitting on a shuttle as it made its approach to the clinic. She was staring at the screen watching the devastation pass. She didn't want to think about how bad Thessia had held up. Earth may have taken the brunt of the fight, but the asari were not nearly as prepared as the humans. Not that anyone was prepared. Vega called up from the cockpit "There it is" and Liara's nerves started to jingle. The building they approached looked inconspicuous; just a garage made of concrete. When they entered the lower level, a steel door opened below the transport revealing a whole different area. The bright, white area held a glass door that slide open. Once they entered, it seemed just like any other hospital: a waiting room, welcome desk, and the smell of antiseptic.

Admiral Hackett was waiting at the welcome desk, "Welcome to Delta Bunker. Let me take you back to the Commander, Doctor." Hackett lead her past a room that Vega was being led to with vending machines and couches as Hackett showed her through the double doors on the other side of the room. They walked down the long white corridor passing doors, and people scurried by in scrubs. They too2k an elevator that required the Admiral's thumbprint. "I just wanted to warn you that the Commander has gone through hell, and it shows."

Liara was wringing her hands, "Admiral, I found Shepard on the Shadow Broker's base. He was just a mass of muscle and tubes then, and I still managed to keep it together."

"Good. You're going to need that." The doors opened and he took her down the hallway. The hallway was well guarded with soldiers posted at every doorway. At the end stood two guards, one she recognized right away. "Major Coats, its good to see you. I'm please to see you survived the attack."

"Likewise, ma'am." He opened the door, and they walked in. They stood in a waiting room with a comfortable looking couch, a nice coffee table, and a big vid console. Coats took them through a door on the right and down the stairs. The stairway opened up on the left as soon as they reached the bottom. Walking past the doorway in front of them, they followed along the left to what looked like an observation window. It was dark where they stood, but the room beyond was lit up with white light. Liara was transfixed by what she was seeing.

In the middle of all the surgeons on a metal slab was Shepard. What little she could see they were trying to treat the burns on his left side. He was on a ventilator and his eye was taped shut. She put a hand on the glass as she was swarmed with relief and despair. She watched as one of the surgeons looked up and exited the room. Liara couldn't look away as the surgeon approached, but she felt a familiar hand on her shoulder. "Liara, I'm glad you could make it."

She turned around to see Miranda's worried blue eyes looking back at her. She gave the woman an uneasy hug, "Miranda, I'm glad you're here for him. How is it looking?"

They pulled away and they both looked inside the operating room. "It's not as bad as the last time, but we also had better resources then. When they brought him in he had some massive internal injuries. If it weren't for his modified trauma module he would be dead, but even still we had to fight to repair some of the vital organs. On top of that he was burned at about fifty-one percent of his body, which is getting into the fatal stage with the type of tech we have available. We're currently doing some skin graphs, but Liara, the damage to his left leg was too extensive. He had fourth degree burns reaching down to the bone. I'm sorry but we had to remove his leg."

Liara just kept looking at Shepard, "Is he alive?"

"For right now, yes. Unfortunately, I can't guarantee he will survive. Look, Liara, I did the best I could. He saved my life on the Collector base and so many times before that. I wish I could do more but . . ."

"You've done everything you could. That's all he's ever asked any of us. He'll make it through." She watched the surgeons work some more, ignoring the people behind her.

"How do you know?"

"Because, he promised me."

For two weeks Liara wouldn't leave Shepard. Everyone told her they would watch him, but she just couldn't stay away for long. When she would try to sleep her dreams were filled with nightmares. The loss of John on the SR-1 still haunted her, and after this scare her dreams were uneasy to say the least. The steady beep of the heart monitor helped erase the dreams. That was why Liara would be found sleeping at his bedside. After a long day of talking to doctors and the Council, Liara found herself nodding off. She felt something tickling her cheek. She brushed it away drowsily and tried to go back asleep but she felt it again. She opened her eyes to see him smiling at her as he gently touched her face. She could only stare at him unbelieving. His voice was harsh and gravely as he whispered, "Is this real?"

"Shepard? You're awake." She leaned over him and pressed her lips to his. When she pulled away she reached up to caress his face, and he smiled again. "You came back."

"I promised I would." He lifted his hand to hold her face. Tears started to well up in his eyes, as he looked her. "Please God, tell me this is real. I don't want this to be a dream."

She looked confused as she looked at him. "Of course this is real. Everything is okay now. No more fighting. The reapers are dead because of you, John. Everything is finally okay."

Shepard could only feel the hazy glow of morphine, and the warmth of Liara. Everything else didn't matter any more. He wasn't sure exactly where he was or if this was real, but Liara was here smiling down at him. He could only see out of his right eye but that was all he needed. He held onto her hand, his only indication that she was real. "What happened? The last thing I know for sure was you taking off on the Normandy."

She sighed as she touched the right side of his face. "I'm still not too happy about that, but it might have saved my life. Chakwas said I had some internal bleeding. Nothing compared to what happened to you. The doctors think you were close to Harbinger's beam, but not directly hit. Whatever the beam did hit exploded causing some damage. Your trauma module kept you alive till you activated the Crucible. Then the shockwave shorted out the module. From what the experts say, your shields saved your life."  
Shepard smiled, "Legion gave me that module after a hairy mission. Said 'Your current module is insufficient' and walked away. I guess he saved my life again."

"Then the universe owes Legion." Liara swallowed. She was nervous, he could tell. He tried to lift his left arm but he couldn't. She finally looked in his eyes to see tears welling up. "John, you took a lot of damage that even the module couldn't help. Your chest plate was fused to your torso in some places that's why your chest might hurt. They didn't want to waste any skin graphs for nonlethal burns. Your face had some second-degree burns, but your arm and leg suffered the worst. They were able to save your arm, but . . . John," a tear rolled down her face. He let go of her hand to wipe it away from her cheek. She finally looked up. The heartbroken look on her face almost undid him. "John, they took your leg. I'm so sorry."

Those words were a blow. He knew that his life had been changed, but he couldn't seem to process this clearly. "And my eye?"

"They're saying that for now you'll need to wear an eye patch, but in time the implant will heal itself. Thank the Goddess they brought in Miranda to help."

He looked at Liara surprised, "Miranda's alive?"

"Yes, and in charge of the team that saved your life. Speaking of which I better—"

When she turned to walk away he grabbed her wrist hard. She winced but he wouldn't let go, "Don't leave me." He couldn't help himself, but he felt that if she left him she would never return. It was irrational, but he knew she was his only link to reality or sanity; he wasn't sure which at this point.

Sensing his panic, she sat back down. "It's okay John. I'm just going to press this button. I swear I'm not going anywhere." He finally let go and she walked over to the far wall to press a button. He could see that she was worried but she didn't leave. She sat next him and just held his hand. A door opened on his left. He couldn't see but he could hear them walking forward. "Good to see you made it through Shepard."

"Well you do good work Miranda."

She walked over to his right so he could see her. She smiled as she looked down at him. "I take it Liara has told you everything?"

Liara ran her thumb over his hand, "I've told him."

The room was quiet. Miranda scratched her chest as she looked down at the ground, "Look Shepard. I did everything that I could, but there was just no possible way we could keep the leg. If I had the resources that I had on Project Lazarus we could have saved it but . . ."

"It's alright Miranda. You saved my life; again. Looks like I owe you again."

Miranda smiled down at him, "We're even, I think. After you saved everyone; I believe the entire galaxy owes you." She scanned him with her omnitool. "Looks like the skin graphs are healing well. You should be ready to leave in a week or two. We'll want to start you on physical therapy soon. I'll let everyone know your awake now. The galaxy has been waiting for you."

That was an understatement.


	5. Old Friends and New Agreements

People started to filter through his room the next week. Garrus and Kaidan were among the firsts as well as Tali and Vega. They had all seemed upbeat and optimistic. His friends tried to ignoring his weakened appearance, but they're thinly veiled optimism was grating. The one constant was Liara. She stood off to the side while everyone was there, and when the Council tried to see him she stood at the doorway forbidding entrance like rabid varren telling them he wasn't ready for a debriefing and he knew she was right.

He couldn't think straight when he tried to remember everything. The morphine was dulling his senses, and he was starting to feel the loss of leg. Now that visiting hours were over and the steady stream of people was petering off he was left alone with Liara. The chatter of friends helped distract him from the thoughts of his missing leg, indoctrination, everything, but the thoughts were always there clawing for attention. He needed Liara's soothing presence, but sitting in the chair next to his bed seemed too far way. She was busying her herself with her omnitool when the silence finally got to him. "What are you doing?"

She didn't look up as she answered, "I'm trying to get Glyph back up. After the Crucible was activated he hasn't been powering up."

"What happened?"

She stopped and looked up at him. She could see something clouding his eyes. Was it worry, panic? She couldn't tell. She was sure the morphine was helping him through the pain, but she could see the mental pain that was harder to hide, especially from her. She turned off her omnitool and went to sit next to him on the bed. He reached for her hand by reflex, which she happily held. She traced the familiar scars on his hand, "After you left the beam you know we took off to join Hackett and the rest to protect the Crucible. We're still getting reports in, but I was able to find out some things. What exactly do you want to know?"

He closed his eyes and squeezed her hand, "Where's mom?"

"She's fine and trying to get to you. The Kobayashi Maru was stranded in the Horse Head System dealing with a mercenary trap. With the mass relays still in the middle of repairs they are making their way here."

She could see some of the weight lifted off of him, "And Anderson?"

This was going to be hard. "In the race to the beam Anderson was hit by a Mako. There was some damage to the mass of nerves by his lumbar and it doesn't look good. The doctors say he won't walk again. Right now know he's recovering and Kahlee Sanders is with him now. They're taking the news pretty hard."

He squeezed her hand hard. Anderson was a father figure for John after his father died when he was young. "I guess none of us really made it out in one piece." He was quiet again. She started to stroke the tense muscles of his jaw. "What about everyone else?"

She leaned forward speaking softly, loving the feeling of his warm skin under her fingertips. "Jack is busy overseeing her students. Turns out they were instrumental on Palaven." His eyelids started to drift down so she started to talk quieter hoping he would fall asleep. "Samara has been eradicating what little pockets of Cerberus she can find. She's been a kind of leader for the Justicars. Same goes for Zaheed but he abandoned the merch band he was signed up." His breathing started to grow slower as she pressed on, "Kasumi is somewhere stealing something. I'm not sure where she is but I do know she's still alive. From what reports I've gotten some pricy things have been disappearing." She paused as he became still.

"What about EDI and the Geth?"

She jumped at the sound of his voice. He was still hanging on but just barely. "Well, EDI was able to notify us in time to send a warning off to the Geth. A good portion of their forces were able to shut down before the viruses hit. They don't have the Legion upgrades anymore, and they took heavy losses. They seem to be fitting into a role well with the Quarians, and have been very instrumental in the rebuilding process. Right now Tali and the some Geth are trying to get EDI back up, but it's harder than what they were expecting." She waited for him to say something, but he remained quiet. His even breathing gave nothing away, but she could tell something was brewing underneath. "What's going on in there?"

He swallowed and kept his eyes closed. That was when she saw the tear leak from the corner of his eye and roll down towards his ear. "I don't know what's real anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"After you left I ran toward the beam. I remember Harbinger's canon hitting something and being thrown and knocked out. I woke up to see the beam was right in front of me. I got up and went through and when I came out all could see was a dark red corridor with piles of dead bodies everywhere. It was like being on the collector ship again. Parts everywhere, tossed to the side like garbage with keepers sorting through it all like insects. It was one of the worst things I've ever seen since Overlord Project."

She was floored by what she heard. The reports mentioned nothing of this. The security footage didn't show anything resembling what he was talking about. She didn't want to interrupt him, though because this was the first time he even hinted about what happened. This was hard for him, especially if he could mention Overlord Project. She could still remember the haunted look in his eyes when he came to her after dropping off David Archer at Grissom Academy. She never brought it up again knowing how much it had changed him as a person. "What happened next?"

"I could hear Anderson saying he made it through and he was describing the same thing, so I pushed forward. I walked up a long ramp to a control room and there they were Anderson and the Illusive Man. The Illusive Man was still trying to convince me that controlling the reapers was the only thing we could do, and what it meant for the human race. Meanwhile, Anderson is yelling at him about how he's been indoctrinated, but he just wouldn't listen. That was when I started to notice it. Every time the Illusive Man would try to convince me I would see those black shadows from my dreams trying to snake all around me. But I kept telling him he was indoctrinated when he finally shot himself. Just like Saren."

He stopped as more tears fell down face. A sense of terror rolled down her spine. She had poured over the indoctrination reports and she knew the warning signs. But everything wasn't adding up. If Shepard was truly indoctrinated then he could have never destroyed the reapers. Her mother was indoctrinated. One of the strongest minds in the universe and yet she couldn't fight its hold.

"Next thing I know I'm talking to the little boy I couldn't save on Earth. He said he was the Catalyst and that I had to make a choice." He finally opened his eyes and looked at her. The desperation was clear and she couldn't look away. "In the end I chose to destroy all synthetic life. I couldn't risk the chance of another Harvest, but it was okay because I knew everything would be fine. You would be safe and that was all I needed, but then I wake up to see that I'm still sitting in front of the beam. It was real, but then it wasn't. I don't even know if this is real. I want it to be so bad because that mean you are here with me, and every time I close my eyes I pray your still there, and not that damn beam. I can't live like this."

Her heart ached with this admission. The torture he must be enduring constantly. The worst part was that even if she was to tell him this was real there was no way to convince him. "We need to find you some answers."

The sense of relief that came with her words was like nothing he felt before. He was so worried that if he were to say those words out loud then she would run as fast as she could. He knew he sounded crazy, but that was because this whole cluster fuck of a war was crazy. He was just happy that his lifeline to some sort of sanity hadn't turned her back on him. Instead she just held his hand calmly. He knew he should push her away so she could at least try to live a normal life but he was too selfish for that. "I have an idea, but you're not going to like it." She looked down and raised her eyebrow. "I need to speak to Leviathan." She started to shake her head, but he wouldn't budge. "It knows what's going on inside my head. I know I promised no more tentacle monsters in my head, but there is already something in there, and I need Leviathan to tell me if it's still in there."

Liara squeezed his hand tighter. "Fine, but I go with you. No matter what. You promise me that I never get left behind again."

He reached up with his good hand and pulled her face down to his. Before he kissed her he whispered against her lips, "Never again".


	6. Answers

**Sorry for the delay. I had a couple papers due for my classes, and unfortunately they take precedence (just barely). Hope everyone enjoys!**

3 Days Later

He wanted to get up and do something. He was tired of lying in this bed with nothing to do but think. After talking with Liara a small sense of relief set in. Now he felt like he wasn't constantly on edge, but it wasn't getting easier to ignore the questions and visions that haunted him. His saving grace came in the usual form of a nubile asari genius. "Miranda is going to give you your last check up and if everything is good you'll be released for rehabilitation. I also have a plan, but we can't do anything until we get you out of here."

"Great, what are you thinking?"

Just then a blue, shifting orb popped out of the thick steel and concrete wall. "Everything is in order Dr. T'soni. It's good to see you Commander."

"Glyph! When did you get him up and running?"

Liara smiled at the hovering orb, "Just the other day. I wasn't even cognizant of what I was doing when he just powered up. I sent my repair data to Tali. Hopefully it can help with EDI." She looked over at Shepard and saw the sorrow in his face. He still felt responsible for EDI even if everyone told him he wasn't.

"Okay Shepard, let's get you out of here." Miranda came forward and started to scan him with her omnitool. After a few minutes she looked up, "Everything looks good. I believe we can get you out of here. Some precautions: your skin grafts are healed but they can still be sensitive. If you are out in the sun you need to be wearing some protection. Your eye is healing quicker than we thought but you still need to keep it covered. Finally, the trauma your body went through was severe. That being said, no strenuous activity." She gave Shepard a pointed look that she also aimed at Liara. "Understood?"

Shepard smiled and agreed. Liara mumbled something as she blushed furiously. Miranda left and Liara helped him get his clothes on. He had swung his body around to sit on the edge of the bed. With the blankets pulled back Shepard looked down. This was the first time he had seen what was left of his leg. His thigh had a calico pattern where the skin grafts were placed. He still had a defined knee but where a muscular calf would be, there was a small remnant of leg and air. The amputation sight was covered with mediwrap and Shepard could see where the tight seam of stitches were almost healed. He stared transfixed at the sight. Then he saw her standing before him. She placed her white-gloved hand on his mottled knee. When he looked in her eyes he saw that she wasn't revolted by his leg or pity for his condition. All he could see was reassurance.

They were careful as she helped him pull the soft workout pants over his left leg, and with the help of a guard he was placed into a wheelchair. He watched as she walked ahead with armed guards surrounding them. There was no one in sight and as they made their way out of the glass doors and onto a familiar Alliance shuttle he started to feel a little panicked. "Where is everyone?"

She sat down across from him as the Marines started to secure the chair. "Hackett ordered a quiet exit."

"Why?"

"Because I asked him."

She watched as the Marines left and closed the door. "Because the plan I have requires some discretion, and it would be hard to accomplish that with news that the Savior of the Galaxy was being released from the Alliance government's super-secret hospital today."

He cracked a smile at her dry tone. "So, where we headed?"

The shuttle's Situational Response screen showed them moving through the London streets. As they went far into the most decimated ruins of London down the Thames River from the Hilton Pier. The shuttle landed and Liara started communicating with someone on her omnitool. His chair was unlooked and he felt a strong hand rest on his shoulder. He looked up to see James standing above him armored and loaded with weapons. "Come on Shepard. I've got your back." The door opened and he could see a couple of Shadow Broker soldiers approaching the shuttle. They stopped and saluted as James was pushing him out of the shuttle.

"It's nice to see you again Commander. Your contact is inside, we'll escort you through."

Shepard recognized them as the Wet Squad he saved on Dranek for Barla Von, or really for Liara. James pushed him up a loading ramp to a warehouse that overlooked the river. Liara was off to the side talking to the leader and he could hear snippets of the conversation that included "Cerberus", "pockets", "infiltration" and "Sect". He tried to listen closer, but was stopped abruptly as they reached the back office. There were three Alliance Officers there guarding a small woman with a pack strapped to her back. She was in plain clothes and looking a bit nervous. At seeing him the officers saluted. A tense moment occurred when the Shadow Broker Agents hesitated to leave and the Alliance Officers gripped their weapons. It took Liara's clear voice to break the standoff. "We need the room. Thank you for complying with our wishes."

The agents left with no qualms and the officers shuffled off. The woman took off the pack and opened it to reveal the Leviathan orb. She left it hovering on the table and walked out. James went to stand guard of the door as Liara pushed him to the table. "Okay, let's see if this works." She locked the chair in place and sat on his lap. She took off her gloves and held his face in her hands. He watched as the pupils in her blue eyes contracted and took over the blue. He felt her presence at the edge of his consciousness and heard her soft voice. "Embrace Eternity." He surrendered willingly as everything turned black. He was warm in this shared space with her. He was facing her with billions of stars around them. She smiled at him sweetly as a feeling of comfort over took him. It was quiet and soothing.

Just then everything turned cold. He could hear water running close by and heaviness settled in the atmosphere. He saw Liara's gaze shift behind him. "Commander Shepard, I thought to never see you again."

He turned around and saw a face he hadn't seen since he was 7 years old. The eyes were the same as Shepard's, as well as the ears, but he seemed so much taller and bigger than he remembered. Yet, as he stood there staring into his father's familiar face he knew it wasn't really him. "I need answers."

The voice vibrated in the deep baritone that bespoke of something beyond any plain of reality. "You require answers for which you already possess."

"Tell me. Was I indoctrinated?" The desperation in his voice elicited only an impassive stare. "When I approached the beam I was shown a vision that I thought was real."

The leviathan walked slowly by Shepard to Liara, "I cannot touch you and yet you are here. Do you know why that is?" She gaped at the figure, looking back and forth from Shepard and Leviathan. She shook her head confused, and the creature looked back at Shepard. "Your will is indescribably strong. I may impose my will and speak to you, but in the end your mind rejects it. Your species has perfected this power over time. You are no different."

"What do you mean, there were thousands of humans indoctrinated."

The figure smiled and reached up to grab a star. He pulled it down and tossed it towards Shepard. It expanded to reveal a whole cluster of DNA strands. He could hear Liara murmur. "Oh my, that is intriguing!"

Shepard looked between the two, "What is it?"

She hesitantly reached up to point at a section of a DNA strand when it rapidly expanded, "This is a human DNA genome but that doesn't look quite right. There is a deformation that I have never seen before."

"Your species has hidden for centuries as we have, only they were able to hide in full view. When I had searched your mind I had found this anomaly. That is why you were released. We had encountered your species long before the first harvest. They disagreed with our use of thralls, and had waged war against our kind. It was only when a concordance was made that the fighting had ceased."

Shepard felt the coldness waver. "So everything I saw—"

"Was an attempt. Your line was weakened through time but you still possess the strength to resist, as you have always done."

Shepard's eyes opened and Liara was relieved to see them clear of doubt. There seemed to be a new light in his that she had missed. "I take it your satisfied with the answers you got."

"Yes"

"Good. Lets get you home."


	7. The Recovery and the Ceremony

3 Weeks Later

It was a hellish three weeks since his talk with Leviathan. He couldn't remember much after leaving the abandoned warehouse, but the next weeks were filled with stilted meetings with the Council, painful sessions of rehab, and tons of questions about peace. He was able to see his mom once she got in. He could tell it was hard for her to see him like this, but she was just happy to see he made it out alive. Other than seeing his mom was safe, the best things to come out of all this was answers and a good night's sleep. Liara was intrigued by their meeting with Leviathan and was trying to figure out what Shepard was, but all Shepard was trying to do was get back into fighting shape. The Council kept trying to hedge favors from their favorite Spectre, but Liara was quick to tell them he wasn't ready. He wasn't sure if he was pissed off because it made him look weak or the fact that she was right.

Since orders for Vega's N7 commendation was to train under him, Vega was happy to help with the physical training. The only problem was that it was coming along slower than what Shepard wanted. Where it was true that the fact he was able to walk around with the crutch at three weeks was impressive to some, he didn't want it at all. He was eager to get a prosthetic ASAP, but with supplies being what they were there was no way he was getting one for at least three months. Not to mention the painkillers he was taking was making a significant hit to his sex drive. In the meantime he was supposed to wait it out on the Normandy, which was dry-docked in London. With everyone still working on EDI, the Alliance was hesitant to release the Normandy, plus it gave him the chance to get where he needed to be for active duty, if he ever got a chance at active duty again. All he could really do was workout at this point and hope for the best.

Liara was sitting on the bed in their quarters on the Normandy. She was staring at the consol interface she had installed so she could be closer to Shepard when he needed the help, but the notion seemed a bit comical right now with Shepard doing pull-ups on the bar Vega installed by the fish tanks. For the most part Shepard had followed Miranda's instructions for three days before he ignored her. She had tried to stop him from over doing it, but Liara quit trying. She was happy to see his renewed vigor, but his activity only seemed to be directed to his rehab with Vega. She didn't want to push him into something he wasn't ready for, but it was getting harder especially with the sight of Shepard's impossibly hard body moving behind her screen. He was wearing just his workout pants slung low on his hips. Thanks to workouts with Vega (and his new implants) his chest, shoulders, and arms seemed to grow at an accelerated rate.

He lowered himself and grabbed the crutch resting against the wall at an easy reach. Liara bit her lip waiting for what she had been waiting for since he started.

"I need a shower."

She hid her excitement behind an impassive look. "Ok, just finishing a transmission." She got up and set the glowing keyboard in the nightstand. She was shedding her cloths as she followed him in. He was already sitting on the stool naked with his crutch leaning against wall. The warm water was pouring over him. Liara joined him as she reached for the soap. She lathered up the washcloth and started on his shoulders. She took liberties to knead the thick muscles. She could feel each muscle start to loosen and relax under her hands. She slid her hands to his neck and did the same thing. She had spent twenty minutes just on his back and shoulders, getting lost in the feeling of his skin. His smooth chest always got special attention as well, but one of her favorite places was his hair. Shepard was hard-pressed for the help, but he definitely didn't complain when she washed his hair. It was getting longer with thick wavy tendrils curling around her fingers. He usually trimmed his dark hair short because of his helmet, but since he hadn't been fighting she figured he wasn't really paying attention to it. She stayed clear below his waist. She had tried the first time but he grabbed her hands and said he could handle the rest. He took the washcloth from her hands before she could even try again and brusquely washed the rest.

The water shut off and he stood facing the wall. Her fun time was over so she went back and put on her pajamas. She crawled into bed and brought out the consol interface again. Shepard had lain down next to her on the bed, exhausted. He snaked his arm around her waist and was silent. She was going over some reports she had been getting about progress on the Mass Relays. He gave a grunt in reply. "I hope you didn't over do it today because we have that ceremony tomorrow."

He replied almost incoherently, "Do I have to go?"

Liara smiled, "I know you don't like these ceremonies but it comes with the whole saving the galaxy territory." That elicited groan.

The Next Day

"Did I ever tell you how much I hate wearing this uniform?"

Liara smiled as she smoothed his navy blue parade uniform. She made sure his gold buttons were polished, his ribbons were in the right order, and the red and gold lariat on his right shoulder was properly positioned. He was fidgeting under her ministrations. "I love this uniform. I think you look impossibly handsome in it." He seemed to stand taller after she said that.

They walked out to the CIC when the ship groaned and swayed in the docking clamps. "Joker, what's going on?"

"I'm not sure, our systems are going haywire up here. Tali what's going on with those Geth in the server room?"

"Nothing! They reactivated a minimal data filter program. They haven't touched anything since." The Normandy lurched forward tossing Shepard and Liara into galaxy map's railing. "Wait a minute, the server seems to be rebooting."

Shepard made his way to the cockpit where Joker was sitting in his blue parade uniform furiously filtering through the ship's computer. There was a shimmer to the left and then the blinking white avatar popped up. "Defense systems at optimal run times; safety firewalls still in effect; quantum computing . . . damage to processors. Processing down to 30 percent."

Joker jumped up and looked over at the pawn-shaped hologram, "EDI is that you?"

"Yes Mr. Moreau, I have been waiting for the safety protocols to confirm the presences of no hostile forces. Unfortunately, the combat mech I once inhabited was made inoperable. For now I will be bound to the ship."

Joker was speechless as he sat in his chair. He his eyes were welling up but he tried to hide them. "We need to go leave for the ceremony, but I'll tell them you couldn't make." Shepard squeezed his shoulder as they turned towards the airlock. When Liara looked back she could see a look she had seen many times in the mirror.

They left Joker with EDI as they made their way towards the memorial grounds. Shepard could recognize that they were making their way to where the beam was. As each building went by he could feel his heartbeat faster. He started to breakout in sweat by the time the shuttle landed. As everyone started to depart he couldn't move, his body wouldn't let him. He could see the large group of people milling about getting ready for the ceremony to start, but all he could see was the battlefield with bodies on the ground and the smell of blood on the breeze. A strong hand and gentle push at the back of his mind brought him back. He looked over to see Liara looking him in the eye. _Do you want to go back?_ She knew he was panicking, but having her there was helping him. "No, I got this. Lets get this over with."

The ceremony was longer than he wanted with the Council, Alliance officials, and civilian leaders giving speech after speech, and the sea of faces were staring at him, but Liara held his hand through the whole thing. Finally, Hackett ordered them to stand as he went down the line to award them with medals. Despite Liara and Garrus' lack of military commission they also received their own Medal of Distinction. Hackett then returned to the podium before approaching Shepard. He spoke of Shepard's early military career, his fight against the Geth, and his battles against the reapers on Tuchunka, Rannoch, and Earth. With orders from the Council, Hackett awarded him The Medal of Valor and Superior Merit. That was when Turian Councilor Sparatus stepped forward to speak, "For the unmatched service Commander Jonathan Walker Shepard has done for the galaxy, the Council hereby welcomes him as the inaugural member of the Galactic Society of Shepards. For your tremendous strength of courage and your continued pursuit of peace throughout the galaxy this distinction will be the highest honor any being can hope to achieve." The Council approached him then. Councilor Valern placed a platinum crown made of small leaves on his head, "To signify the knowledge to know what is right I present to you this symbol." As he stepped back Councilor Sparatus walked forward and presented a saber that was inlayed with all the different metals from the Council home worlds. "To signify the strength needed to defend the weak I present to you this symbol." Finally, Councilor Tevos walked up and placed a heavy metal with the Council's crest etched in it, "To signify the compassion needed to do what is right I present to you this symbol." As the asari councilor joined the others they all bowed in respect to Shepard, who wasn't quite sure what was expected of him. Thankfully, the crowd erupted in cheer saving him from having to do anything.

They were escorted off stage and made their way back to the shuttle they all sat in silence with Vega looking at his sword and Javik hovering over his shoulder. One of the first things he did after he sat down was take the crow off his head and handed it to Liara. She was studying the inscriptions Garrus finally spoke up, "Well, savior of the Universe, now that you have the most prestigious societies named after you what are you going to do next?"

Vega was quick to speak up, "We need to celebrate. I'm tell you I got a guy who can get us some grade A beef steaks and I'm sure I can find some chicken wings, I will grill like nobodies business. We need to celebrate: the Reapers are gone, EDI's back online, and Shepard's alive!"

Shepard smiled, "Yeah, just like on the Citadel. Let's do it." 


End file.
